Travels Through Yosemite

Concluding the Summer Travels with a trip to my favorite place in the world, Yosemite National Park.


Being Single Sucks Sometimes

I'm sure this blog post title comes up in every Christian woman's mind if she is still single past the age of 25. And probably even more year after she turns 30.

The month of July was a month to wrestle with how do I really feel about my singleness. This is a topic that I often tend to talk about in hushed tones because it feels like people don't want to hear the single lady complain about well being single. There are well written (and lot more poorly written) things about how to be a good Christian single lady.

But honestly it sucks sometimes.

It sucks that I've been on 2 real dates and had no boyfriends. It sucks even more as I watch my students, who are younger than me, surpass me on this all the time (it was even worse when I taught middle school and watched junior high relationship drama unfold in the middle of the classroom).

It sucks to sometimes feel crappy at friends weddings when I really just want to dance and party and celebrate but I can't always escape that nagging feeling of - what if this never happens to me.

It sucks to be home on Friday nights feeling sad about myself because I'm not getting asked out, when I know in my brain that my worth is not determined how many dates I get.

It sucks that singleness can be such a focus of my worth, when I know I have so much more about me than my relationship status.

It doesn't suck all the time. Sometimes it's great. Sometimes it's awesome to be at weddings and dance all the time and be a little flirty. Sometimes it's awesome to be home on a Friday night in your PJ's watching tv or reading a book, sometimes its great to not have had a boyfriend yet because that means no ex-boyfriends and a significant lack of relationship drama in my own life.

But yeah, being single after the age of 25 and watching your friends get married and have babies can not always be the most fun. It's not always about making it "better" but admitting it's hard. I'm not going to write today about why being single is great - I'm just acknowledging that it isn't easy. And if you are in this boat with me, then lets hang out. Maybe we'll complain about how it's hard, maybe we'll rejoice in how its great, and maybe we'll write a book to help other single ladies deal with the frustration and joy.