The Twin (30 Days of Gratitude)

Sol is my best friend. God wanted us to be in each other lives and I often have to revisit the story of how we met to know that is true. We shouldn't have met, it was clearly orchestrated by Jesus. We met at the Fresno Urban Internship back in 2010 - neither of us planning to go to FUI a second time, both of us wanting to be in other places, both having faced some hard rejection and trying to figure out our lives. We became deep friends during the six weeks there.

And since then we haven't lived in the same space since. That is hard. It is hard to have my best friend live 300 miles away from me. I was in SLO when she was still at UCLA. Then I moved to LA and she moved to Fresno. And our lives just get more full instead of less. And this is when the ugly beautiful returns - something that is so hard and difficult but that brings me closer to Jesus. It's hard to be joyful and thankful when seasons aren't easy but that's why it's a discipline to be thankful. Emotions are like the wind, they come and go in gusts and in breezes but thankfulness shouldn't be dependent on emotions.

I ramble. Probably unwise to post so late when I should be asleep. But as I'm in a season that feels full and my best friend lives far away - I want to remind myself why I'm so grateful for our friendship.

She gets me. She understands that when I need a cupcake that my world feels upside down and I really want to cry in a corner. She understands that I get easily excited over little things and joins me when I squeal over sloth socks or inappropriate magnets. She understands that I verbal vomit and talk in circles before I get to what I'm really feeling. She understands that birthdays are super important to me, because they are super important to her. She understands that when I don't speak, I'm not checking out but I'm too emotional for words. She knows what it means to be an InterVarsity staff work and knows what NSO, Myers-Briggs, GIG's, one on ones, MPD, Follow-Up, and all those IV lingo terms mean.

She challenges me. She reminds that the world does not revolve around me. She challenges me to continue to have grace for people, to forgive others and forgive myself. She brings me into her stories and her life so I may learn from another culture, from another perspective. She challenges me to see things outside of my persecutive, to never settle for less than my best, and to open myself to the ways Jesus is continuing to transform me.

She encourages me. She sees when I am hurting and sits with me. She grieves with me and laughs with me. She will talk on the phone about the things we are both looking at on Pinterest or will not hesitate to quote an entire episode of friends. She sees other people. She asks for their stories. She says hi to everyone, whether she knows them or not, if she doesn't know them - she gets to. She teaches me how to see the people around me that I would normally pass by.

She is my inspiration - risking a lot, putting herself out there, sharing her voice with others, and opening herself up to be transformed and used by Jesus in this season of her life. I'm so glad that Jesus brought us together that summer three and a half years ago. You are amazing. I love you girl.